I Lie Because I Love You

I’ve heard it from my friends a million times: “I lie to her because I love her”. But no matter how often I hear it, it rubs me the wrong way every time. The realist in me says a man can love a woman while still doing other things on the side, and not wanting to hurt her, should lie to her about it. But the idealist in me finds it very hard to envision the concept of love without respect, honesty, and protection following suit.

As women, we all want to feel protected, and men do it because they are taught growing up that that’s part of being a man. I know men who cheat think they’re protecting their lady by making sure she’s not worried about what else they’re doing, or stressed about losing them. I get that part. But what about protection in the bigger sense of the word?

Like protecting her from wasting her time with someone she has to share when there’s someone out there she can have all to herself? What about protecting her physically instead of putting her at risk of catching something you bring home to her (ya, condoms don’t prevent everything)? Or protecting her ego from having another girl call and let her know she’s been sharing her man for the last few months?

There are lots of ways to protect your woman other than forcing her to live in ignorance. But those ways, true protection, require unselfishness and sacrifice. Sacrificing what you, your d*ck, and your ego want, for her heart and what’s best for the relationship. Sacrifice: the ultimate evidence on love. Without it, you just care a whole lot. There’s a difference.

***Note: Yes, I know women do this too and so this concept applies to everyone. But truth is, I’ve personally only heard this specific rationalization from men, so that’s the way I wrote it.

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• 1way2play said October 09, 2009

  This is true what u say. It takes a certain level of maturity and admiration for your partner to be faithful. A woman has to seperate herself from the pack in order for me to give her all of me. There are a lot of beautiful women out there but my first thought when I see you should be I wonder what she has to say, If you are strictly sex appeal than you have nothing on top of the next lady

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• LILSIS said October 11, 2009

  So true that the road less traveled takes SACRIFICE.... the ultimate evidence of love. I ADORE THIS POST.

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• six8pwrhouse said 4 days ago

  maybe i am an idealist and feel that you can't lie and make it work....but i have been around people who have made it work based on lying but that is them and to each its own. all i can do is shake my head cause I do not believe its right.

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